photo: Jenae Lien
Seeing it, hidden, look away It doesn't affect me Not really Does it? Does it? Until it does. The cries of injustice beckon When will we heed the call? Hypocrisy, megalomania, the show of the now We cannot just screen it Not anymore Where is your realization? Your outrage? Are you listening? Where are your words? Where are your tears? Bring them now for the world is fertile seeds for change.
“What the f*ck are we gonna do?”
This question from @lesdogggg (Leslie Jones) on Instagram last week prompted me to outpour in a comment that never published because I left the screen before finishing up and it disappeared. So let me restart and finish my thought here (it’s an outpour).
First, I want to say that Black. Lives. Matter. Next, I want to say I’m sorry. I don’t just apologize. I. Am. Sorry. Sorry for the behavior of so many white people for generations. Sorry for my own complicity in the face of my discomfort. I am sorry that my ancestors enslaved your ancestors. I’m sorry the White Man has raped and pillaged the Earth, that my ancestors were part of the genocide against Native Americans. I’m sorry to all marginalized groups for anytime I have not stood up for you when I could have. I’m even more sorry that as a collective people, as a nation, we have not come together to face our greatest mistakes, mistakes that have poisoned the very soul of our country. Europeans came over to a “new land” and simply took it for our own after killing off millions of natives who were “in our way.” We came with idealist visions of freedom, human dignity, and yet we swallowed our own hypocrisy and had human beings as slaves. The U.S. Government has committed incredibly heinous acts against Black, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) for centuries which has led to an institutionalized system of prioritizing whites over POCs and indoctrinating its citizens with the same sentiment. Our greatest crimes have never received justice. Guess what. They’re not going to forget. Not Indigenous People. Not Black People. Not Asian People. Not People of Color. No One. We couldn’t forget if we tried. Humanity has not reckoned for all its misdoings, its “sins,” but one way or another, the truth will have to be faced. Karma can only be delayed, not avoided.
People won’t stop until they are constantly called out and held accountable for it. I’m from the South and admittedly there are people in my own family who fall on the wrong side of this. I’ve called them out before (of course there are plenty of times when I’ve said nothing to “keep the peace” at a family function, but that is over) and I will continue to have the uncomfortable conversations. Our nation is in pain. It started 400+ years ago when we made a horrendous mistake and poisoned the very soul of our country by executing and “sanitizing” the indigenous peoples who originated here while embracing and proliferating a system of owning human beings as slaves. We have a karmic debt to pay and the balance is overdue.
So this is what we’re gonna do. We are going to keep peeling back this onion until every layer is revealed and we confront our history. Only then can we heal, together, collectively.
photo: Jenae Lien
This reckoning was coming and everyone has always known it on a deeper level. How long did we, white people, think it was going to take until the pain, mistreatment and continued degradation/enslavement/murder caught up with us? Even if one of us, personally, is not committing an actual hateful act or saying a racist word against someone, every time we allow another white person to spew racist idiocy from their mouths and we do not call it out, we are being complicit. From calling Native Americans a “conquered people” to saying African Americans have all the same opportunities as white people (they only do on the surface (optically), but behind that is the truth – meet your “diversity” numbers and then you’re good). Exposing it and calling folks out really is that simple. Actions make change, feelings stay in our minds and simply allow the perpetual, systemic, institutionalized, pre-programmed racism to control the narrative of our lives – in our schools and great halls of justice, in the parties we attend with “off color” jokes that we allow to stand; in the way we don’t use our dollars to send messages to asshole businesses when they support racism and white supremacy.
We all know, all us white people, of the many, many, numerous incidents we have let slide right in front of us. There are so many times that we didn’t call someone out for a ridiculously racist comment because we were too uncomfortable. Because after all, white people have the privilege to ignore it. We don’t have to (we could but we don’t) feel it on a deeper level because it doesn’t affect our fundamental identity or reality.
photo: Jenae Lien
We have been afraid of the social or familial repercussions, the discomfort, even in the face of our own hypocrisy. I, myself, have both called people out and down right argued with racists in their faces (even family members), but I have also done that other thing. That thing we do when we just don’t want to deal with the argument and the “cost” of pointing out the WRONGness of racism. But the only “cost” is being uncomfortable and possibly losing an acquaintance or even a friend. Is that loss of comfort not worth offering someone a teaching moment that may cause them to look within and do some self-reflection about their own values and biases? And even if they don’t, do you really want to share energy with someone who is racist? Really?? How can we look past it anymore? We can’t.
Is the cry loud enough this time? Can you stop being lazy and compartmentalizing the atrocities you hear/see everyday and attempt educating yourself on the realities of life for POC in America? Can you reach out more to your fellow human non-whites and open your heart to identifying with them as people? Can you walk in their shoes for even just one day?
This is some tough love/harsh truth here but one of the biggest reasons I left the south, couldn’t wait to get out, “escaped” the South, as we who move away say, is 99.5 percent due to the racism. There is an unrelenting delusional hope for going backwards in time. The complete comfortability with being a racist, just not being called one. The complete hypocrisy of clinging to Christ when you see People of Color as a lower life form at worst, and an uninvited guest at best. The FAKE-ness of every word or action toward a person of color being filtered so your real hateful views toward them don’t show. The ridiculous fragility when confronted with your own racial bias or racism with very commonly heard terms said by racists like: “You don’t know what’s in my heart.” This is typically said after explaining why Black people are an inferior life form and will always be criminals. I was so tired of the cognitive dissonance it created. I wanted to go somewhere where people weren’t “openly racist.” But of course, that is yet another way white people remove themselves from the uncomfortableness of racism. Because we can. We have that Privilege. We (used to) get to feel good knowing we were not racist and could carry on with our lives. Yet, all that has changed now.
This goes so deep. It is up to white people to help peel back all the layers and stand up for POCs with our privilege. Anyone who has gone to history classes in America has had a very WhiteWashed version of events fed to us (whites and people of color) so as to keep the status quo – White American Superiority over All. Yet all we have to do is dig just a fraction deeper, look to other sources of information beyond institutionalized abridged information, and it’s all right there – our very dark, dirty, ugly, Bloodstained American History. White people in power (the supremacists) don’t want Black people (or women or any other minorities) to get into power lest they turn the tables and visit their sins back upon them. I mean, let’s just call it out!
White people continue to benefit from this society while Black, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) live in a completely different America. How is this so? Why can’t we see it? Why are we so unwilling to look? Why is it so easy for us to ignore it? The simple answer is because we don’t live it but the bigger answer is that we are completely detached. It takes a conscious effort to go there because we don’t already live there, so it’s an inconvenience to white people since white lives don’t have to contend with racial bias and discrimination on a daily basis. Yes, as women, regardless of color, we have bias and discrimination to deal with but that is a different essay altogether. Today I speak about racial, not gender, bias and discrimination. Of course they all cross, but again, that is not the point of today’s communication.
I applaud all people who are currently calling this out, supporting the Black Lives Matter movement and giving us resources to address our white privilege and the ways that we have been complicit in systemic racism. We have to change and we have to stand up for our African American brothers and sisters in all situations no matter how uncomfortable it makes us. From the demands for justice against violence to everyday comments made in passing, we, especially white people, have to call out racism when we hear it and see it. With friends, with family, in casual conversations – people wouldn’t dare say the things they say or make the “jokes” they make in the presence of BIPOC, so they shouldn’t do it when they aren’t present, and we can no longer allow it to go unchecked.
Remember that. Also remember that just because we are highlighting how Black Lives Matter does not mean we are diminishing any other causes. People need to stop being so self-centered and self-focused. This is a specific social movement addressing excessive violence against Black People. You see something happening and immediately turn it to the lens of “Me” – what about Me? What about you? Are you actually listening or too busy being defensive? Of course in the context of humanity, All human life matters. But saying Black Lives Matter is NOT saying that other lives don’t. That is such a close minded view to have. It’s simply emphasizing that we don’t seem to think Black Lives Matter as a society due to the ignorance about institutionalized and militarized racism, and we need to be reminded that their lives do, in fact, matter. The FOCUS right now is on Black People and racism against BIPOC with regards to how our authorities treat minorities.
I won’t deny that we don’t stand up enough for ALL our brothers and sisters in the world. But when we DO stand up for one of them, that is not the time to say – what about all the rest? That is a very narrow-minded, devisive thing to do. We can’t keep Silencing one movement because it doesn’t encompass all movements. It’s truly ludicrous that we keep having these stupid debates. It’s as if people argue to simply NOT face the WORK they need to do with their own racism.
In our efforts to have justice for George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor and so many many more (including new ones, unfortunately, every day) we are subsequently fighting for reformation in the system that perpetuates atrocities toward all POC. It is important that we do not forget the names of ALL people being Unconstitutionally held in prison and done so at a disproportionate rate compared to whites – like Native Americans. They have the longest history of fighting the U.S. Government and continue to be incarcerated, killed and mistreated.
We continue to allow white supremacists to get away with murder after murder after murder. We have filled our police forces, legislatures and municipalities with white supremacists and now one has taken over the White House. We should be very afraid and realize that we cannot sit idly by anymore, allowing hate to swallow us all up into the abyss of Fascism. It’s right here, people. It’s not just at the door. The call is coming from inside the house!
White is not right. White is the darkest of evils in this world right now. Only until we accept our karma and APOLOGIZE – for Occupying Native Lands, for Slavery, and Acknowledge the 400+ years of systemized racism that our country is built upon, Face that Pain and Guilt and Hypocrisy and Wrongness, Sit with It and feel the waves of Compassion wash over us as we realize how we’ve treated our fellow humans – can we even begin to right this wrong, to truly heal. Then turn around, say You’re Sorry, Make Reparations and ask how You can Support the Healing Process and a Transition to Unity.
Black Lives Matter. Black and Brown people are being killed by white officers and white vigilante armed citizens and while law enforcement is doing nothing about it. It’s not new, it’s just been emboldened by an imbecilic hateful attention monger who is so in over his head he is trying to push this country into a civil war for his own amusement. If we’re at war, we’ll really be too busy to see the fascist regime that has been closing in on us for years now.
If you’re truly a compassionate person or consider yourself to be a Christian and you are worried about All lives mattering, then you should be Mad As Hell about all the murders upon Black Americans that happen with zero accountability.
What is going to take for you to have some compassion for your African American brothers and sisters on this planet? Stop pretending. Own your bias if you have it. Own your racism, your hate even, if you have it. Face it, ask yourself why you are racist IN YOUR HEART? Does it even make sense or have you been indoctrinated? Confront your own bias and racism. It’s not easy at all. In fact, it’s VERY uncomfortable, but it’s the work we all have to do. I am willing to see my racial bias. I will not pretend that I do not have any because that is simply impossible.
If you have any disdain or fear in your heart or mind toward Black People, Indigenous People or any People of Color, I beg you to realize that it’s an illusion based on nothing. You’ve been indoctrinated. Most likely you don’t even know enough about your own neighbors to truly form an opinion so how can you form an opinion on your fellow Americans you’ve never even met or taken the time to get to know? You don’t need to be ignorant. You don’t need bias or hate. Simply notice it and release it. Learn how you can be better. Make an effort for real, with yourself, not by texting a black acquaintance you haven’t spoken to in years or black influencers or by donating only. Really get out there and talk to folks. Get to know real people and you’ll see that we really are All. The. Same.
I’ll leave you with a clip from one of the Woman Sees World interviews with a young black woman explaining how white people can help race relations in this country.
EPILOGUE: Our country is in pain. Humanity is in crisis across the world but nowhere as raw as it is in the U.S. right now (May/June 2020). I started this website to give women a voice, women from all ethnicities, backgrounds and socioeconomic levels. I wanted to create a place w/o the labels (black, white, rich, poor, educated, uneducated, professional, secular, single mom, minority, immigrant, etc.) to discuss the most important topics of life and the world from the history keepers/story tellers who have historically been ignored in the global narrative, Women. The goal is to help women remember their sisterhood and their greater mission to heal this world. I do believe that it is Women who will help save the world. Women of all ethnicities and backgrounds. Men have fucked up this world in a way we could have only imagined a few hundred years ago. Yet, here we are. I do not hate men nor do I think women are blameless. Far from it. We need each other to make things right. We have to have balance but for too long the scales have been balanced toward men. There is no doubt, and it shows in our own global history, that patriarchal societies have bad endings. They lead to greed, exalted egos, individualism (versus collectivism) and ultimately, human demise. Any system that disregards half of its population is a system doomed to fail. A system that disregards ANY part of the population is doomed to fail. We cannot evolve as a collective species without each other and recent world and national events are proving that truth beyond any doubt. I am here to offer my essay on this moment in time in our humanity. We have to change and we are whether we were ready for it or not. We are in the “birthing” process now from one way of thinking and being, to another. This uprising had to happen, it’s been on the edge for a couple of generations and now, finally, we are at a place where we can go no further into the greediness/separateness of our current “value” system.
Here, capturing my own feelings of pain and shame as a white person, a white woman, I am sharing my vulnerability with you and I hope to reveal a greater, more optimistic truth for our future.
Photography: Jenae Lien
#blacklivesmatter #whitesilenceisviolence #nojusticenopeace #toallmywhitefriends #toallmyblackfriends